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Sunday Sentimental…

10/05/2008

Peace Cool World,

Last Sunday I was able to go out with my homegurls. We were celebrating the release of INDUSTRY CRUSHER MAGAZINE (cop YOURS!)  Well, the venue we visited has an open mic. I used to frequent the open mic at ELEVATION SUNDAY on a weekly basis. It gave me reason to write poetry…because I KNEW I’d have a venue to share it. Needless to say, its been a long while since I got on anyone’s open mic.

At the heeding of a close gurl friend of mine…I agreed to say something last Sunday. Mind you, I had NOTHING prepared as I had no intention of performing. Long story short? I got on the mic and basically said what ever came to mind. I DID attempt to be coherent, relevant, and organized. But as for subject matter? Format? NONE! I don’t know if I’m a funny looking person, or if the things I say are just that hilarious…but the crowd responded VERY WELL! I think I had good timing, spoke on things folks could relate to…and was very comfortable.

Which brings me to the POINT of this entire blog. I MISS PERFORMING! I miss getting up in front of people. I always feel so shallow for even wanting to do it, but, truth is…and last Sunday REconfirmed it: I’m GOOD AT IT! Something inside me turns on…

I KNOW its what I’m supposed to do. Perform…in some capacity. Hell, its a part of the reason I became a flight attendant. Flying, unfortunately, is NOT the same. So now, I guess I have to FIGHT this feeling of being vain, or self-concious…Fight the psuedo-humility and JUST DO IT! Right?

In college, I hosted shows, acted in plays, wrote and performed monologues and poetry, spoke at programs and rallies. And once I DIDN’T finish shool…I guess I didn’t feel worthy of pursuing that goal. Hell, Last winter, when I released my collection of poetry…there were performances and speaking engagements. But somewhere along the way I convinced myself that it was WRONG for me to enojoy the attention, the accolades, the audiences. But Hell….being on stage is the only time I have felt completely in my element. Completely comfortable. I’m not a politician. Not an actress. Not a leader. I’m not even JUST a writer. I am a performer…ANd it’s what I need to do.

Its what I’m GOING TO DO.

Bear with me Cool World…I have a feeling that this is the begining of something very interesting…

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3 Comments leave one →
  1. 10/05/2008 10:46 pm

    You should definitely get back to performing. I know i definitely enjoyed you that time @ Beans and Bytes. Keep me posted if you decide to get up again…

  2. BCAM permalink
    10/06/2008 3:39 am

    Cool Crys you are so gifted and talented. You have a god givin gift so use it to the fullest. You deserve all the praise and accolades that you receive.
    You are an inspiration. There are people who look up to you, who needs to hear the words of Cool Crys…don’t be selfish and deprive them of their fix of you. If being on stage changes 1 persons life then it is worth it C.C. especially if it makes you happy.

    -Peace-

  3. Qui permalink
    10/10/2008 2:34 am

    You know we love you so you might as well……….

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